This is day 2 of trying to be more confident with who I am.
Today was a Monday. I had to go to work. So I did my usual routine of waking up at 4:30 am but laying around until 5:15 am. I just felt too tired to want to physically get up. I recently get in the habit of sleeping in the clothes I was going to wear the following day (to help limit the amount of time I needed to get ready in the morning). I have decided that not only is it gross, but it could also be the reason why I'm sleeping poorly and why I w
ake up in a bad mood. So I'm going to make sure I sleep in other clothes that are much more comfortable for sleeping and help connect my mind to relaxation.
I got up out of bed and started my coffee. Most of the time, I feel like it's a race to get ready before my coffee is finished making. Allowing me a stressful few minutes of trying to get ready with a stopwatch. That is causing a lot of unnecessary drama in my head and in my morning. So I've cut that out. I just make my coffee and I throw some oatmeal in the microwave.
I went to the bathroom to look in the mirror. I put on some eyeliner and mascara. My hair was still in the bubble braids. It still looked pretty cute so I went with it, I just spruced it up a little bit to refresh it. I also took all of my vitamins this morning which for some reason makes me feel better about who I am as a person. I also put on a pair of earrings. Little fake pearl earrings to spice it up. Lastly, I brush my teeth. I do brush them when I'm walking around straightening up my home, putting my teacups away, cleaning off the counter, and straightening up a blanket. But I still do it so that counts, right?
I went and got changed and while I was in my room, I decided to take an extra minute to make my bed. Just taking a minute out of my day to do that makes me feel less like a slumlord. It also makes my room look nice and neat which can help with the mental moods of my day. Just these little things helped me feel better about leaving my house and working while also not really taking up much more time than when I was racing the clock. I was able to leave my house in a calm mood rather than feel like I'm running behind or rushing to get to my destination.
I get to work about 2 hours early because I have a lot of FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out, if you didn't already know) and I sit and drink my coffee and read for those 2 hours. That time is important to me to just relax before a busy day. I am able to disconnect and listen to music or do some mindless scrolling or read. It also gives me the opportunity to sleep in if I am feeling like it or stop and get a drink at Starbucks sometimes.
I spend the next 9 hours trying to have a positive attitude when patients were annoying me or being rude. I had to make sure that I don't let that negative energy they are bringing to me affect me in a negative way. I can grab that energy and turn it into a positive. I also made sure that I didn't say sorry unnecessarily. This will help with confidence. If you stop saying sorry for things you're not actually sorry about, then the meaning will grow and only be utilized when you actually feel sorry.
I came home and I just cleaned a few dishes I had. I reheated some pasta I made a few nights prior and I made some tea. I was able to relax and watch some Netflix while enjoying my tea. I don't like tea still but it is helping me sleep better at night, and because of that, I am SO THANKFUL.
Mondays are always tough. I came up with a saying called “Monday blues” where it's just mentally and physically and emotionally exhausted. But if you remember that work is a tool to help you experience life. You should not be working your life away. You should be able to have a life outside of that. Since the pandemic, it's been hard for me to realize and understand that. I've taken up many extra and late-night shifts to support the rest of my company during these difficult times. Because many operations, restaurants, and other businesses limited their hours or closed down, for the time being, it feels like it's been hard to do anything but work. However, making small adventures out of little things can help you through burnout and help you discover your real passion in life.
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